I can’t take credit for the inspiration behind this blog so I won’t pretend. I actually wasn’t even planning to write anything today but then I found myself reading the following: Don’t Buy Girls Drinks in the Club… PERIOD!
I was so passionate about co-signing this blog that I didn’t feel a mere comment would suffice. And so here we are.
I was also reminded of a quote I heard recently: “Women are the only ones I know that can leave the house broke and return home drunk.”
Besides the blog and the comments that followed I really didn’t have much to add other than my own personal belief system. And that is: WIM AINT BUYING YO ASS NO DRINKS.
Well into my 20s this was not only a rule but a personal law. Before I threw in the dating towel, I would have bought a few select women drinks. Namely girlfriends, my girlfriends’ friends (up to 5 anyway, the rest of’m gonna go thirsty – where yo money at?!?) or friends of friends or family or some other pre-club-understood relation. I was over 25 before I ever bought a complete stranger a drink.
Even now it is more likely that I will buy a girl I’m not interested in a drink than a girl I am interested in, because I don’t want the girl I am truly interested in getting the wrong impression – that I’m some kind of trickin ass ninja. Because I’m not – and I don’t want her to get her hopes up. Proving once again that you can’t believe everything rappers tell you, it is in fact trickin even if you got it. I wrote about this here. Much like playing the lottery, trickin is often a favorite habit of people who can least afford to waste what little money they have; however, that’s another topic of discussion.
As you’ve probably noticed, I’m a simple man. But some might call me a strategist. Therefore, in my younger club going days I didn’t even start approaching women until 1 to ½ hour before the club closed. Then I performed what my boys and I affectionately referred to as “the sweep.” Meaning you “sweep” the club collecting as many numbers from as many attractive women from as many different areas of the club as possible. Noting that by this time you should have already mentally selected which women you want to approach and chances are they are sufficiently intoxicated on drinks purchased by guys far less handsome and with inferior game to yourself. It’s surprisingly effective. It goes something like this:
Disclamier: Ugly men or men with the absence of confidence DO NOT attempt the following. I strongly suggest you stick with purchasing women drinks.
You: Excuse me, I saw you earlier but I didn’t get a chance to meet up with you. Man, what a shame. **puppy eyes** So, are you here with anyone?
Her: **struggling to stand up straight** No.
You: O, well what’s your name? My name’s [insert your name]. I hate to be rude and I know we didn’t get to talk much but unfortunately **sad face** my boys and I are about to leave. You think there’s anyway I can get your number? Maybe call you sometime? I understand if this is kind of rushed, again, I apologize. **if you have straight teeth, insert a confident, yet innocent and broad smile here; otherwise, keep your jacked up teeth having mouth closed and raise your eyebrows as if in a curiously awaiting her answer type fashion**
Her: Sure.
You: **Thank her, but don’t over do it! You aren’t a transient and this isn’t charity. Secure her number and confirm by repeating it back or holding your phone up. Granted she’s probably intoxicated, so I suggest repeating it aloud if the music allows for it.**
You: Tell her you’ll call her “later.” DO NOT COMMIT TO A TIME! However, wait 2.5 seconds to make sure she doesn’t say “call me, tonight.” – Which, as a side note, is the second most powerful three-word string known to man.
Afterwards, relocate to another section of the club, OUT OF EYESHOT!!!
You: **repeat steps 1 – 3 as necessary**
If effectively implemented, you won’t need to buy them (or there less attractive friends) a drink even if you were the drink buying type.
I kid but seriously, the only dudes that feel like they have to buy a woman a drink in order to have a conversation with said woman are unattractive, no game having wack dudes or dudes trying to overcompensate for a quality that you unfortunately have not become privy to, yet. That or unlike my boys and I, they have no game plan. Hell, before pursuing prey even ants develop a game plan. Think about it.
O well. Any woman that would expect me to buy her a drink is 9 times out of 10 a woman I wouldn’t want to date, as I’m sure this is only the beginning of a long list of flaws I don’t have the time or the patience to explore. I could be mistaken but I guess we’ll never know. As I’ve gotten older I’ve become less and less adamant about not buying women drinks, but it is definitely not my first line of offense and if I feel like its expected I’ll probably cut the conversation short and go on about my merry way.
So ladies and gents, what are your thoughts on the subject? Ladies, as part of the normal courtship ritual, do you expect drinks to be purchased on your behalf? In your opinion, is this part of a man being chivalrous? Why or why not?
Fellas, are you a drink buyer? If yes, please ignore my calling you wack above and feel free to defend you and your family’s honor in the comment section below.
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